Camera PV 2007 » Digital Camera » considerate children anyone?
considerate children anyone?
Question:
>My youngest is a daughter, and I guess daughters are just more thoughtful. >Her husband is only slightly younger than me. He is a real nice fellow, with >more class than I have ever seen. He comes form a real tight family group >of 9 brothers and sisters all who are extremely talented. They have these family >reunions, at resorts all over. They plan to take a cruise one summer with the >whole gang of parents, and grandchildren.
As my grandmother used to recite: A son is a son until he takes a wife, But a daughter is a daughter all her life.
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call >considerate children. >This is such a good topic for discussion here. I have three children who are >generally quite considerate. They all lead very busy, productive lives. They >all contact me fairly regularly by phone or email. We get together 4 or 5 >times a year, and always enjoy our visits together. >However, I have discovered that they really don’t realize that I am getting >old, or that I will ever be different from when they grew up. I occasionally >remind them how old I am so they will understand that I am not quite so lively >as I once was, and have a few of the aches and pains of aging. Admittedly, >they were all relieved when I sold my house and moved to an apartment for older >adults. >One daughter indicated that I might begin acting my age. Instead, I go >traveling with a boyfriend, and am beginning a new job with an Internet >startup. So much for the traditional picture of the little old white-haired >lady with the cookies. I really wanted to be conventional, but somehow have >ended up with a more Auntie Mame type of existence. >-Connie S
My candle burns at both ends; It will not last the night; But ah my foes, and oh my friends — It gives a lovely light! – Edna St.Vincent Millay
Response:
>>My youngest daughter called from San Fran, where she is an exotic dancer in >a massage parlor, and my youngest son will be eligible for parole in three >more years, and he calls often. >Sweetie, dancing isn’t what they do in a massage parlor. Sorry! >-Connie S
Connie, I am smiling at this and wondering if you have ever actually been in a massage parlor or just heard ‘rumors’/ Laughing with you and not at you. Carol
Response:
Just wanted to see if you were paying attention. I defer to someone with more experience in such matters. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Sweetie, dancing isn’t what they do in a massage parlor. Sorry!
Response:
Around here, the only people who get to go are the cops. It seems to take them several visits to have enough for an arrest. Why is that? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >I am smiling at this and wondering if you have ever actually been in a >massage parlor or just heard ‘rumors’/
Response:
>Once you get a digital camera, I think you will find yourself sending more >pictures because it’s so quick and easy to do. >This morning someone I know asked me for a description of something I had >built. Within 5 minutes I had taken a picture and emailed it. >Dick
We’re just in the "looking" stage of digital camera buying. I see some of the higher resolution cameras (Sony 3.1 megapixels) coming down below $1,000. Do you have any recommendations as to what is acceptable and not acceptable? Ron Kelley
Response:
>Lighten up Dick, >Children are not minor Gods. >I tend to respond as I did when posts get too personal for me. >My kids are all doing well, and making piles of money. >My grandkids are doing fine too. >Sure I’m warped. >Aren’t we all?
How sad… the only comment he makes about his kids is that they are "making a pile of money". Ron Kelley
Response:
Scanning and sending photos over the Net should be a big NO-NO. It takes up huge bandwidth and the results are usually much less than satisfactory. The way around that is to post them to your webpage. These can be had for little or no money. Send an e-mail and say look at the pics on http://www.myaren’ttheycute.com/. Much faster and they may even be legible.
The digital photo idea – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> sounds interesting. Right now, we use our scanner to send pictures, but it can > be slow if we’re scanning a lot of photos.
Response:
>My youngest daughter called from San Fran, where she is an exotic dancer in >a massage parlor, and my youngest son will be eligible for parole in three >more years, and he calls often.
Sweetie, dancing isn’t what they do in a massage parlor. Sorry! -Connie S
Response:
>When they were alive I called my parents once a week. Although we lived on >the opposite coasts ot the US we visited one another every 6 months. >Cajun
That is what I do, but my health will not allow me to travel as much. Calling once a wek is good and decent amount of calling for older parents. Carol – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call > considerate children. Many of my friends tell me their children > who are all living far away never write call, send birthday cards, > Christmas cards, etc… > How many calls are enough? Once a week, once a month, > ever six months, once a year? > I personally only hear from one of mine on a regular basis, which is > once per week. They send rolls of film from a digital camera of > all they places they go, and their lives. Really nice! > Inquiring minds want to know. > Carol
Response:
Lighten up Dick, Children are not minor Gods. I tend to respond as I did when posts get too personal for me. My kids are all doing well, and making piles of money. My grandkids are doing fine too. Sure I’m warped. Aren’t we all? – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Jim, it seems obvious that you have no children – and – if you do, one can only >hope that they never see this. Can you say ‘warped’?
Response:
Rita: I’m happy that you passed Dick’s family values litmus test. I failed miserably; but he didn’t offer to help me as he did you. So I guess I showered and shaved for nothing. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Rita, you are, indeed, a fortunate person. There is not much that is >better than a great family. Good for you! >Now, you and I have to work on your politics.
Response:
When they were alive I called my parents once a week. Although we lived on the opposite coasts ot the US we visited one another every 6 months. Cajun
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call > considerate children. Many of my friends tell me their children > who are all living far away never write call, send birthday cards, > Christmas cards, etc… > How many calls are enough? Once a week, once a month, > ever six months, once a year? > I personally only hear from one of mine on a regular basis, which is > once per week. They send rolls of film from a digital camera of > all they places they go, and their lives. Really nice! > Inquiring minds want to know. > Carol
Response:
Collect, I’ll bet. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > and my youngest son will be eligible for parole in three > more years, and he calls often. >I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call >considerate children.
Response:
>>I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call
considerate children.>> One out of two isn’t too bad. >How many calls are enough? Once a week, once a month,
ever six months, once a year?>> thank goodness for e-mail and instant messages. Dave http://members.tripod.com/~VideoDave
Response:
>I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call >considerate children.
This is such a good topic for discussion here. I have three children who are generally quite considerate. They all lead very busy, productive lives. They all contact me fairly regularly by phone or email. We get together 4 or 5 times a year, and always enjoy our visits together. However, I have discovered that they really don’t realize that I am getting old, or that I will ever be different from when they grew up. I occasionally remind them how old I am so they will understand that I am not quite so lively as I once was, and have a few of the aches and pains of aging. Admittedly, they were all relieved when I sold my house and moved to an apartment for older adults. One daughter indicated that I might begin acting my age. Instead, I go traveling with a boyfriend, and am beginning a new job with an Internet startup. So much for the traditional picture of the little old white-haired lady with the cookies. I really wanted to be conventional, but somehow have ended up with a more Auntie Mame type of existence. -Connie S
Response:
My five grown children in their thirties call occasionally, write less often, and rarely visit. When we moved to another state after retirement, they have been too busy with their own lives, careers, children, and geographically closer in-laws to have the time for us. They seem to be in a phase common for the 30’s bunch of focusing more on what we didn’t do for them and our failings than the fact that we devoted our 20’s, 30’s, and early 40’s to them along with a substantial amount of money. Meanwhile, we are networking in our new community, and keeping in touch to the extent that it is comfortable and not painful. We have encountered a number of friends whose grown children are similarly unresponsive; most people don’t want to talk about it. Some of us feel guilty as though somehow it is our fault because we didn’t do as much for them as they now think we should have, and that being human, fallible, and imperfect was, retrospectively, unforgivable.
Response:
- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >My five grown children in their thirties call occasionally, write less >often, and rarely visit. When we moved to another state after retirement, >they have been too busy with their own lives, careers, children, and >geographically closer in-laws to have the time for us. They seem to be in >a phase common for the 30’s bunch of focusing more on what we didn’t do for >them and our failings than the fact that we devoted our 20’s, 30’s, and >early 40’s to them along with a substantial amount of money. Meanwhile, we >are networking in our new community, and keeping in touch to the extent that >it is comfortable and not painful. We have encountered a number of friends >whose grown children are similarly unresponsive; most people don’t want to >talk about it. Some of us feel guilty as though somehow it is our fault >because we didn’t do as much for them as they now think we should have, and >that being human, fallible, and imperfect was, retrospectively, >unforgivable.
Wonderfully stated message! This tells me that my group is in the "norm" I had one who is now 42, and in the 7th grade he tested out of English and Literature with the top ten percent of High School Seniors in the entire US. I hardly ever hear from him. The last time I spoke to him I assured I would absolutely hang up on his ex mother in law, a ritzy Dr.’s wife, because she kept refering to him as the SOB, and I was a non B. This one has a real way with words, and could sell hog farms and make them look like Manhattan Real Estate. I guess this is how he gets all these rich, good looking women, he looks great in the Social groups. The middle son is approaching forty, and I hear from him by tracking him down through his half brother’s email address. He is a real hard worker with lots of talent, but no common sense, and a hot temper. He is a good person, but rather like an old cowboy type, riding, roping, and sking mountain faces. My youngest is a daughter, and I guess daughters are just more thoughtful. Her husband is only slightly younger than me. He is a real nice fellow, with more class than I have ever seen. He comes form a real tight family group of 9 brothers and sisters all who are extremely talented. They have these family reunions, at resorts all over. They plan to take a cruise one summer with the whole gang of parents, and grandchildren. I still feel blessed even with the absences. Carol
Response:
My children are very considerate; because they were raised properly and given a good education. My oldest son and oldest daughter are married to each other; and this cuts down on the need for correspondence. Their children are a little weird; but what kids aren’t? My youngest daughter called from San Fran, where she is an exotic dancer in a massage parlor, and my youngest son will be eligible for parole in three more years, and he calls often. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call >considerate children.
Response:
I once met a grateful child! She was about 35 and driving one of those $100,000 cars (Ferrari?) with the license plate that said "TGDI". I saw her in the Post Office and ask her what her license plate meant. She said "Thank God, Dad Invested". – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > My five grown children in their thirties call occasionally, write less > often, and rarely visit. When we moved to another state after retirement, > they have been too busy with their own lives, careers, children, and > geographically closer in-laws to have the time for us. They seem to be in > a phase common for the 30’s bunch of focusing more on what we didn’t do for > them and our failings than the fact that we devoted our 20’s, 30’s, and > early 40’s to them along with a substantial amount of money. Meanwhile, we > are networking in our new community, and keeping in touch to the extent that > it is comfortable and not painful. We have encountered a number of friends > whose grown children are similarly unresponsive; most people don’t want to > talk about it. Some of us feel guilty as though somehow it is our fault > because we didn’t do as much for them as they now think we should have, and > that being human, fallible, and imperfect was, retrospectively, > unforgivable.
– f. m. mcneill Business: http://www.fuzzysys.com "The way to do research is to attack the facts at the point of greatest astonishment." — Celia Green That is not amusing.
Response:
> I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call > considerate children. Many of my friends tell me their children > who are all living far away never write call, send birthday cards, > Christmas cards, etc…
Our offspring are in their 40’s. They write and/or call occasionally. They have their own careers and families which occupies all their time—- almost. We feel they pay as much attention to us as is appropriate. As they grow older and their children leave home we expect they will communicate with us more frequently. > How many calls are enough? Once a week, once a month, > ever six months, once a year?
Depends upon the specific circumstances. > I personally only hear from one of mine on a regular basis, which is > once per week. They send rolls of film from a digital camera of > all they places they go, and their lives. Really nice!
That’s nice. We receive photos occasonally also. > Inquiring minds want to know. Carol
Yep. Dave — In Maryland; The Land of Pleasant Living & http://www.linvillelandharbor.org
Response:
I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call considerate children. Many of my friends tell me their children who are all living far away never write call, send birthday cards, Christmas cards, etc… How many calls are enough? Once a week, once a month, ever six months, once a year? I personally only hear from one of mine on a regular basis, which is once per week. They send rolls of film from a digital camera of all they places they go, and their lives. Really nice! Inquiring minds want to know. Carol
Response:
Jim, it seems obvious that you have no children – and – if you do, one can only hope that they never see this. Can you say ‘warped’? Dick – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > My children are very considerate; because they were raised properly and > given a good education. > My oldest son and oldest daughter are married to each other; and this cuts > down on the need for correspondence. Their children are a little weird; but > what kids aren’t? > My youngest daughter called from San Fran, where she is an exotic dancer in > a massage parlor, and my youngest son will be eligible for parole in three > more years, and he calls often. >I am curious as to how many in this NG have what they would call >considerate children.
Response:
Conventional? Seems like, any more, there is no ‘conventional’. And, of course, from our standpoint, this is great. Do your thing! You are setting the pace for those younger than you. Day is just around the corner when a young person (under 55) is going to say: "Hey, Connie S. showed us the way!" Good for you! Dick – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > One daughter indicated that I might begin acting my age. Instead, I go > traveling with a boyfriend, and am beginning a new job with an Internet > startup. So much for the traditional picture of the little old white-haired > lady with the cookies. I really wanted to be conventional, but somehow have > ended up with a more Auntie Mame type of existence. > -Connie S
Response:
Rita, you are, indeed, a fortunate person. There is not much that is better than a great family. Good for you! Now, you and I have to work on your politics. Dick – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I have eight children. They were worth the investment. > I have two daughters who live in the same city as I do, and we > talk on the phone a few times a week and we get together > wekly or bi-weekly. Another daughter lives in California, but > EMails me almost daily. > Another son in California and I chat by EMail (bless EMail) and he > sends me plane tickets every couple years to come visit and gave > me my computer. Another son has moved quite a bit — from U.S. to > Belgium, to Canada, to New Jersey and now to Chicago area. He > and his wife have four little girls and my daughter-in-law loves > having company — they invite me to come stay for as long as I like > and so I spent 5 months in all in Belgium, a month in Canada. I > accept the invitations because when I visit I cook and relieve my > daughter-in-law of having to do this — there are things she likes > doing better and she likes having someone around to be with the > kids so she can get out alone. She is a wonderful person and has > been exceptionally kind to me. > Now I have a new daughter-in-law in Brazil — she and my son were > married this summer and I feel very close to her already. She wants > me to come visit for a month or more whenever I like. > Then I have two sons in the Midwest, and I do not have as much contact > with them, although one will be visiting New York this fall. The > other is a member of a fundamentalist church and does not have much > at all to do with his father, me or the rest of the family. This is a > bit painful but there is nothing at all I can do about it — I feel > worse for my former husband than for myself since his health is not > good and it distresses him greatly not to be in touch with a son. > I also am lucky to have a wonderful son-in-law living in my city — > he is as dear to me as my own sons and is exceptionally thoughtful > about offering to do things I need done in my apartment, driving me > to buy plants (which we both love), helping with my garden space, > etc. > All in all, I would say I consider myself a most fortunate person to > have the family I do. They are very accepting of all my > eccentricities, which seem to increase as I get older and older. > Beyond that, we have a lot of fun with each other — humor has been > a family characteristic and I like that.